Ooooh....

You can clone yourself.

Handy power - just don't overdo it. I've heard weird things happen.

I'm Pandora, by the way. Nice to meet you.

Whoa, cool. Want me to come over? Like, now, I mean?

That sounds like a power. You're probably not going insane, you just erupted with the ability to make clones of yourself.

Um, what? I'd like to help, but I'm not a barf towel.

So, if you really want me to come over, I will. But no barfing on me. Deal?

Okay, I'm on my way.

Multiple women?

Hmmm, you as cute as your picture?

And you over 18?

That's just gross. She's young enough to be your daughter!

We are but men. Dee Ee Vee Oh.

I think I'd rather just enjoy the show from afar, but forgive an old coot, kid. Sixteen's legal in my state, and I'm not fucking dead, you know?

You misread me. The implication was that I was interested in watching you take advantage of yourself. Also, it was a joke, a joke made because it was the obvious joke.

But like the Joker always said, if you have to explain the joke, it's not funny, anymore.

I'm a gentleman, sweetheart. But I'm not a fucking saint.



Only jerkoff frat boys play Halo. Real men play Team Fortress 2.



I wrote something long here about language and superstition, but your choice of Comic Sans became too distracting, and so, in substitution, I give you:

Man, I remember going through that too. I was vomiting blood and formaldehyde for nearly six days. Can't I wanna unlive those days again.

If you think last night was bad, girl, wait until you catch your first backlash. It's hard describe, but that pylon Pandora took in the gut is probably about half as painful.

At any rate, good luck in your struggles.

So?

Fact is I don't tap underage, it's a bad idea legal-wise and fact is they don't tend to be any good in bed. I'm not a big fan of splitting untapped poon, give me a beauty with some experience between the sheets.

Dude, you know it. I've gone through withdrawel, a bat upside the head, and gutshot TWICE. I'd rather got through all that shit again instead of those damn headaches.

Hell, I'd settle for anything at this point.

Second.

Because I have to ask - what about underage with 'some experience'? Does that change your mind? Or is the legality of it enough to stop you?

Note: I'm not someone with much sexual experience. Because if I don't say that, someone will assume that I meant that I do have experience in the sack.

And that I was trying to hook up. Which I'm not, mostly because AZ's age of consent is 18, and I'm not yet that old.

Honestly, kiddo? I'm over thirty. I'm pretty sure teenagers are outside the compass of my mating pool, "experience" or no. That isn't a matter of legality, although I do respect the law. And it isn't so much a matter of morality, though I wouldn't ever take advantage of a woman of any age. It's mostly a matter of practicality: I don't have much in common with women my own age, let alone ones half my age. I guess that means, in theory, that I could see my way to duty-free fucking with someone young without having to concern myself with the minutiae of our personalities, but you ladies aren't exactly beating down my door, so it's pretty moot. Besides, to be honest, even if a young lady's got more "experience" than Traci Lords, I probably wouldn't be able to shake the nagging feeling that I was doing something wrong.

What if she clones herself and you are involved with both. 16+16=32... No problem there.

(That was a joke btw.)

So here's a real question... If you are both 16, and 16 is legal in your state, but the girl is from a state where the age of consent is over 16, but you are in your state when it happens? Is that legal or not?

Negative, kid. It's a crime because you're considered to have transported a minor over state lines for sex. It's a class B felony by most states. Afraid you're stuck waiting for the girl to become legal in her locality, her emancipation, or her becoming a legal resident of another state. Those are your only options, really.

Don't tell me you managed to slime your way into Jael's panties on the first date, eh?

Nothing like that! I was just curious. Nothing happened on our date. Anyway, I would not hit on Jael, she has a boyfriend and I doubt she's that kind of girl. Besides, she's did me a big big favor by coming to make Alice jealous and I owe it to her not to take advantage of the situation. Besides, she's 17 and a senior, I'm just 16 and a sophomore, she wouldn't be interested in me anyway. I was talking hypothetically about another 16 year old.

So it's not okay for her to have sex with you outside of her established relationship, but it is okay for her to pretend to have sex with you in order to torment a third party.

Just checking.

Ah, I see your kung fu is strong, Fox-san. But mine is stronger. I was a teenage boy once upon a time, too, you know, and I know all your tricks and then some. Here, allow me to add the subtext you left out:

"Nothing like that! I was just curious (Okay, exactly like that). Anyway, I would not hit on Jael (unless I thought she was receptive), she has a boyfriend (who I've never met, lives in Arizona, and who I'd never have to meet or deal with in any way), and I doubt she's that kind of girl (but I really, really kinda hope she is). Besides, she's doing me a big big favor by coming to make Alice jealous and I owe it to her not to take advantage of the situation (of course, it wouldn't be taking advantage if she wants it too, right?). Besides, she's 17 and a senior, I'm just 16 and a sophomore (so I already know it would be legal, I checked), she wouldn't be interested in me anyway (that's a good, humble-sounding thing to say that'll hopefully throw Jael off the scent of how much I want to baaaaaaaang her if she happens to read this).

I wouldn't bother dissembling, kid. Frankly, if you didn't want to nail every piece of sexuality-appropriate teenage genitalia that came across your path on some caveman, lizard-brain level, there would be something wrong with you. You don't have to apologize or try and weasel around it, dude. But don't tell me I don't have your number, either.

After all, I'm the fucking Kung Fu master.

Yes, that is entirely correct Flicker. It IS okay to pretend in this case. Alice was a bitch. Jael told me what Alice said to her. She called me a dog that followed her around. I haven't done anything to Alice, but if I did, she WOULD deserve it.

You sir are filled with win and awesome.

And now you have piqued my personal curiosity. Just what exactly would you do that you believe this Alice person would be deserving of for this apparently grievous insult?

Let the punishment fit the crime, and all.

Dude, I bow before the master! I'd be lying thru my freakin teeth if I said I wasn't attracted to her. I just wouldn't push my self at her under those circumstances that's all.

ZerO:
I don't know. I haven't decided yet, I haven't even decided if I will do anything. I've already gotten the satisfaction I was after of some closure. Besides, Jael really helped me get over her and gave me some perspective on the situation. And before your lizard brains go there, get them out of the gutter, that's not what I mean.

Remember what I said about money well spent? I haven't smiled for this long in many years.

That is a question I have been trying to answer for quite some time now. It is always intriguing me to watch where lines of conversation go. Especially over the OpNet.