The door swished shut behind her and Kyria leaned up against it, letting the artificial gravity pull her to the floor. She's managed to hold herself together for most of the evening; it wouldn't have done to be seen as weak or disappointing to her father's associates. Now in the new room that was hers at least for a while, she let herself feel the silence again.

*Father? Please wake up. I don't know what to do. I'm not ready for this. What if I make a mistake? I'm not you. I can't replace you. What if they fail because I'm not as strong as you? Please, please wake up.*

She knew he couldn't hear her. She knew if he had been able to, he'd have told her it didn't matter. Earth needed protection and guidance and that was why she was born; if her start was a little rocky, then she'd simply have to learn to adapt. She hiccuped through her sobs and hugged her arms to herself.

A monitor in the infirmary registered the smallest of blips at that very moment but then returned to normal. The man in the bed never so much as twitched as far as the cameras could tell.

Joani headed to her private quarters torn between sadness and frustration. She knew she shouldn't let herself go like that but since the accident and Gabriel's near-death she couldn't stop thinking about... about how much time she had spent running away.

Each time she left home for her duties as Leader of the Paragons she ran away. At least she felt like that now. She should've stayed at home when the kids needed her but her faithful husband was always there and that made her excuse to leave a little bit easier. She loved Ulric so much and she felt guilty for not giving him more. Her thoughts kept spinning around that matter and she couldn't manage to free herself out of that spiral of self-reproach. As she came nearer to her quarters her superhearing caught barely audible sobs and she stopped to listen in closer and try to locate its source.

Joani scanned the doors in the corridor with her x-ray vision and located Kyria inside one of the crew quarters with her arms wrapped around herself sitting there and sobbing. Slowly she approached the door and asked, "Kyria... are you ok? It's me, Joani."

Kyria almost missed the knock, and when she realized who it was that was knocking she tried to stifle her hiccups and wipe away her tears.

"I-I'm fine." She hiccuped again, loudly, because she'd been about to say something else.

She's crying...

"You sure? Mind if I... join you and give you some company?", Joanis voice was a mixture of compassion and hope. She didn't want to be alone but the President wasn't the kind of company she was looking for. She hoped Kyria would let her in.

Kyria swallowed the last of her sobs and took a moment to divest herself of the hiccups. She rubbed her eyes, knowing that it wouldn't matter for telling that she had been crying but doing it anyways. She stood and opened the door, stepping aside as it swished open to let Joani in. Even for having been empty before, the room felt devoid of any signs of life. Of course, Kyria hadn't really come prepared for a long-term stay and had nothing with her but the eufiber colony she was wearing.

"Come in, please." She'd taken in the tone of Joani's voice, and as per everything she'd be raised to be asked, "Is everything okay?"

Joani smiled warmly at Kyria as she entered the quarters. "I was about to ask you the same question. I heard you...", Joani stopped in midsentence and realized how impolite she actually was eavesdropping on Kyria. She was sure the young woman didn't want anyone to know that she was crying.

Too late, botched this one already.

"I heard you sobbing and thought I could give you some comfort. A shoulder to cry on, if you need to. I perfectly understand that you're worried about your father... we all are."

Joani offered a hug but didn't expect anything from Kyria.

(ooc: Joani is wearing her Supergirl uniform btw. There is a picture in my Character Description)

Kyria blinked at Joani, for a moment confused as to what she meant with her gesture. She'd been alone in her childhood so much, even with the servants, instructors, and nannies about,that she didn't quite grasp that she was being offered friendship. She stepped forward hesitantly and hugged the most famous woman in the world. The absurdity of the situation, and the stress of the past few hours finally broke in her and found herself suppressing a fit of giggles.

"Sorry...I'm not laughing at...I don't really know why I'm...sorry." She was blushing and looking anywhere but at Joani.

Joani felt the awkwardness of the situation too and she had to swallow down her own frustration. She closed her eyes and sighed.

"It's ok, Kyria... it's ok.", I can't comfort my own children, how am I supposed to comfort her?

Holding Kyria in her arms she remembered all the times when she was out on duty or patrol for the Paragons when she should've been home with her family. She missed Karas and Gabriels first steps walking and if it wasn't for her superhearing she would've missed their first words, too.

Without Lorean she would've missed Gabriel's inauguration ceremony and Kara's 18th birthday... she was a bad mother. Joani could've stopped there... she could've fought down the emotional turmoil within her but she didn't want to and then she started to sob herself.

As warm tears flushed down her face Joani let go of all the burden that rested on her shoulders and she cried without wailing, innocently and vulnerable.

Kyria held Joani as she cried, trying to keep an even keel on her own emotionally storm-tossed mind. She waited, murmuring words that weren't really words but that she remembered from when she was little and thought she was hurt.

Once Joani had cried herself out, Kyria tried to catch her eyes, "Are you okay? Is there something I could do to help?" Helping others is what she had been raised for and it was surer footing that she'd had since coming aboard.

Joani nodded feeling both embarassed and relieved. She wasn't supposed to lose her composure, not infront of this young girl.

"I'm ok...", she managed to say without sounding too far off.

Joani smiled briefly trying to re-establish her self confident demeanor but failed with the attempt. "I shouldn't be talking to you about this..."

I'm scared to death, Kyria... I don't know what to do. I've never felt like this before... so helpless, so alone... - all these thoughts she wanted to scream at her, but she remained calm.

"I almost lost my boy and realized I've spent too little time raising him up. I feel guilty for not being there for my children... then I saw you and Michael and suddenly this all came back to me. All the self reproach I've suppressed over the last decades, all the doubts I had about my decisions. I'm not really a strong personality, Kyria. If it wasn't for Ulric I wouldn't be the woman the world has come to know as Supergirl.", Joani suddenly stopped.

"I'm so sorry for letting this all out on you... I wanted to help you, give you some comfort but instead its the other way around."

Kyria tightens the hug for a moment, then steps back and smiles. "It's okay. Honestly, the best thing for me right now is something else to focus on. I can't help my father, not enough anyways, and at least here with all of you I can do something more useful than my physics research. Besides, you've spent so much of your time helping the world, keeping it safe and making sure other mothers could be home with their children. That they didn't have to worry about living or war or crime the way people did at the turn of the last century. You deserve someone to listen to you, someone else to lean on."

Kyria's voice, nova enhanced as it was, was even more compelling for the sincerity and utter belief in her tone. This was one of the cornerstones of her emotional education, one of the foundation her father had set for as to why she existed. She stepped over to the bed and sat down on it, motioning Joani to join her if she wished. As she spoke she seemed be older, or at least wiser, than her seventeen years. "We're all the products of our decisions, and we are what makes the world. Look at Earth, at everything that has been accomplished because of who you have been to us and who that has allowed us to be. You've been mother and savior to a whole planet, and your children are beloved leaders of that world. You may not have been with them all the time, but your actions and you kindnesses were still felt."

Joani gladly accepted Kyrias offer and sat next to her. She couldn't remember the last time she had the opportunity to just be herself without living up to anyones expectations, even not to Ulrics. Just as she finished that thought she felt guilty again for being so selfish.

"I'm so confused, Kyria... emotionally confused. For a moment I felt a strange anger I never have felt before and it was directed towards Cody. It scared me that I could feel so... so enraged. I always held back... I always do.", she looked down to the floor and swallowed hard.

"I know what you say is right. And I am grateful for this wonderful gift I've been given. When I was about your age the only thing I ever wanted was to be just that person. But today... especially today I'm not so sure anymore. Is that a selfish thought? And what scares me the most is that I feel strangely detached from...", Baselines she couldn't manage to finish the sentence.

Kyria didn't quite follow the end of Joani's thoughts, having never really thought of humans as baselines. They were human, she was a nova. She'd never been 'baseline' and couldn't really imagine what it would be like. Beyond that, her father had kept her sequestered enough and impressed upon her her responsibility to the race, not the individuals. Personaly empathy with individual humans was less than her strong suit.

Kyria thought for several long moments, finding many pieces to this puzzle and deciding just what picture she wanted to make. "Maybe you should stop, then. At least for a little while. Other people take vacations, and most people don't work as long in their lifetime as you already have. An exhausted or unenthusiastic hero does little good for the world. You need to take care of yourself as well."

Joani looked at Kyria as if she didn’t understand the meaning of the word ‚vacation’. “I can’t just take a vacation, it doesn’t feel right. I’m not exhausted… not physically.”, Joani watched Kyria sitting there next to her. That girl may never see her father again and she was doing nothing about it instead lamenting her own problems.

One fine hero you are, Joani., she thought to herself. “I’m really sorry for what happened to Michael. We should’ve seen that coming and prevent it. I think I’m taking too much blame on myself, though. It’s hard to cope with the truth when you realise that there are things you can’t do.”

Joani stood up and gave Kyria a compassionate smile, “I just wanted you to know that if you need someone to talk to, I’m here for you… and”, again she didn’t finish her sentence but she knew Kyria heard her anyway. … and even Heroes like myself can’t do everything or save everyone…

Kyria smiled and nodded to her childhood hero. "Thank you." Her eyes drifted away as she continued to speak, "My father is an idealist, but he's practical. No one can have plans for every possibility, so the best we can do is to nurture and promote those around us. That way there is always the best to put forward, no matter what might befall a single individual. I know that. I know that because that is what he taught me; I won't fail him at the first test."

She stood herself and gave Joani a polite parting bow. "Thank you for comforting me and trusting me. Both are gifts I will treasure."