I've had the opportunity recently to speak with a few novas and we've talked about how we have changed since our eruption. We are continuing to evolve in very different directions as individuals, though some are going about in hard to define patterns.

My purpose here is two-fold. First off, how do you see yourself evolving and what do you think you are moving toward. Secondly, I hope that maybe in a year or two we can revisit this thread to see how right, or wrong, we were and examine what we have since become.

I think I'm slowly evolving into a super-human individual. Everything I do, I do at levels markedly above baseline potential in virtually all fields. I don't currently don't see a way for me to alter this development path.

I'm not changing. There is nothing I can do today that I could not do days after I erupted, and it's going on over a year now. Maybe my node is broke. Not that I'm complaining,mind. I love being who I am, nova or not.

Man, I hope so....

Huh, I must be evolving into a totem pole.

What concerns me about my development is all of the animalistic urges that come with my morphic changes. the other day I had to focus just to not give into the desire to chase a squirrel that had crossed my path (I was emulating cetain canine traits at the time). That may sound funny or cute but believe me it's scary.

I've also had other wierd primal urges too. the desire to run down prey and devour it, wierd mating urges, and other instinctual behaviors I can't really define with words. So far it only happens when I've taken on animal characteristics which is a good thing I guess; but I'd really like it to stop.

It ain't gonna stop until you give into it. You're trying to controll something that you don't know exactly how to define.

All bullshit aside man, I'm an expert on primal urges. The only way I grew to control most of mine was to at least accept and give in to them. Once I understood them and the triggers behind them it was easier to ingnore/control them.

You may have a point there.

The thing is many of the "urges" invole doing things theat'll end up hurting/maiming/killing people and land my ass in jail. Not that I think there is a jail anywhere in my area that could really hold me if I put my mind to it but I'm not interested in reinacting that prison break show...

Nature red in tooth and claw. Eh, don't worry about the whole hurting/maiming/killing thing. Shit happens, people and creatures die every day, it's the natural order of things. If your prey isn't meant to die then trust me, nothing you can do will take it down.

If it drops however, well, that's just how things are. The hunter eats for one more night, life goes on.

If you're worried about killing baselines, spend more time in the wilderness. Get your rocks off, and go back to town for drinking, fucking, and what have you, then go beck to the wild when you feel the urge to tear a bears spleen out out through it's throat with you teeth.

Always helps me relax.

Or, maybe by learning to master and control our impulses you can become stronger and more confident that you direct your own destiny.

Its easy to give in to your impulses and urges. The sentient response is to think. Being ruled by your instincts is a cop-out, because you can do better. Novas do overcome their base impulses every day, so don't blame it on being a nova.

Ditto.

What was once a whisper in the winds about me has become a full blown symphony in my spirit. My power over the winds and storms grows. It grows slowly but steadily.

Ever heard of 'Know thy enemy?'. When I popped I was a ball of instinct and everything in my path was prey. Only by giving into that, learning the triggers for my instincts, and activly resisting them was I finally able to learn how to control them.

It wasn't until I understood them through experience that I was able put the proper safeguards in place in my lifestyle that would permit me to resist them.

He may need the same treatment.

You make a good argument, Primal. The nova condition, with its heightened senses and mental stesses could force a major departure from the base human condition. I imagine the key is figuring out when you are adapting and when you are simply giving in.

Of course I make a good argument, I'm fuckin' awesome. With out ME it's just aweso.

I've become stronger with my healing, smarter, and have developed a totally new power. Recently, I feel I've met a break in my progression though. Its frustrating.

Exploring your wild side is all fine and good until you devour Mr. Muggles, the neighbour's pet....in front of your neighbour. Or some other equally unpleasant behavior.

After that you can look forward to a life of sedatives, tazers and really unpleasant examinations and probes. Or expect to be running alot.

take that for what it's worth.

Lets see:
-I kill small animals and plants on touch., and even if I am near them for any length of time.
-My skin is black, and has a rainbow 'sheen' to it.
-I can change to any substance, as long as it isn't made of living tissue.
-I can change my shape to anything, as long as it doesn't look human.
-A group of radical enviromentalists have made me the target of their psychotic emoting.
-My brain has been growing larger.

I'm becoming an oil spill.

Oil spills have brains? Bigger brains for that matter?

Otherwise, have you noticed any changes in the environmental effects of your presence?
Can you exhibit any control over them?
Are they getting better? Worse?

Has your abilities to change improved, or do you find it about the same?
How do you qualify getting larger? Is it a physiological thing, or a cognitive phenomena?

So far, and thankfully, I only kill small things. My cat died while sleeping in my lap. My housplants died rapidly when I watered them. The nice thing is that mosquitos and flies and other vermin ignore me. When I go to the park, which I don't do anymore, I leave footprints of dead grass. It probably explains why Greenwar wants me eliminated.

I can't control how I effect the environment.

I haven't noticed any differences in my shapeshift or mimic abilities.

From the research I have read, part of my brain, the 'node', has grown considerably. I have verifid it with CT scans. It has grown 200% since I erupted. Also, my intellect has grown as well. I'm not sure if it is related to the growth of my 'node', but it could be.

It will be interesting to see where you are in a year with this.

He'll most likely be targeted for termination.

Targeted by who?

What's the point of being paranoid if I can't have enemies.

Baseline agencies, who else?

Look, they have this rule about remaining the dominant species. If Changling there is walking through the park and makes one or more people sick or dead he'll be targeted for termination.

I konw of a guy who got the short end of the node stick and they tried to off him just because he suffered a huge about of Taint during his eruption. Something about his node not reacting well to cancer cells. Anyway, it fucked him up big time so they tell him they can get him help and blah blah blah... turns out they wanted him dead.

If Changling becomes a liability to humanity, they will kill him.

I would not paint all of them with such a broad brush. The ones I work for appreciate my unique gifts. Sure they know not to bring plants to brighten up my office, or to bring their new puppy or kitten by for show and tell. They have been understanding and accomodating.

Where I have a problem is with environmental wackos. Not only do they not like who I work for, but they see me as the personification of everything wrong in their narrow little universe. These environazi's are composed of Nova's like you and I. They have their baseline followers, but the leaders are all like us.

I don't think that people, by themselves, are a threat to one another. It is their ideologies that breed the conflict. As an unapoligetic and open member of the Teragen, you are seen as a threat by others. It is not because of who you are, but because of the ideology you follow. It scares people.

Sure, a species evolves and needs to compete for land and space and resources. But does evolution itself mean they will seek extinction of all other species? As higher order being, human and Nova, we have the ability rationalize and make choices. We are not like the trese in the forest, who seek to block out their competitors sunlight, killing them. We can decide to forego our base and primitive evolutionary natures (most of the time-rational self-interest is still a big part, and that leads to my last point). As thinking beings, we come up with beliefs that tell us the way we think things ought to be. Those are called ideologies. Now we come back to the root of the problem.

I'm not trying to paint them all with a broad brush. I could run off a list of names and identities of a few that might come to whack you but I've been warned about brewing shit storms on the opnet (we all answer to someone, no?) so I'll not.

I'm just saying bro, watch yer back. It's cool the peeps you work with are amiable to you and your 'special requirements' but it's all the other ass wads out there that'll knife ya in the back.

Oh, and I happen to be a nature lover... so uhh, keep yer ass in the concrete jungle and we'll be fine. Heh. Seriously, if shit gets to deep for you, call, I'll be there, claws sharp an read to go.

So...I decided to try a little experiment a few days ago. You see I live on a "ranch" of sorts, or at least it used to be, in an area known for it's hunting. I decided to take Primal's advice and give in to the predatory urges that sometimes hit me when I morph.

It's the middle of the night and I've taken on qualities of night predators; wolves and jungle cats, that kind of thing. I figured it would be safer to to this at night to avoid running into any hunters. Anyways, I spot this huge buck. It's presence fills my senses. I don't just see it, but it's like I don't know, how do you explain it? The smell of it makes me hungry in a way I've never felt before.

It must've caught wind of me because it bolts and without even thinking I give chase. My body transforms almost instinctively into a form more suited for speed. I don't how long I chase this thing for, I'm working almost completely on instict at this point, before I burst out of the woodlands and into onto some rancher's property. One of my neighbours. The buck is already halfway accross the clearing but a smell or a feeling, I'm not quite sure, pulls me in another direction. Bigger prey, more meat, is close, and can't escape.

All I can think about is this need for for meat, for blood. I don't recognize it as anything other than prey at the time but what I've stumbled into is a bull's pen. This thing is big and mean but that doesn't matter. It's prey, it's meat and I'm hungry. It tries to gore me, it wants to get away but in the pen it has nowhere to go. I'm all over it, I tear into it. I kill it with my bare hands. In the end the prize is mine and I drag it back into the woods.

It took me a while to come back to myself and when I did I was a long way from home and covered in gore. I don't really remember much else. I'm not sure what to do now, I guess that's why I'm even posting this. I definitely don't want to loose myself like that again but at the same time it was, I don't know, amazing.

Oh and apparently I left a big trail leading up to the bull carcass and the story hit the local media here. I feel bad about butchering my neighbour's bull but I'm not exactly sure about what to do about now.

Does anyone have any advice or suggestions?

Next time don't leave a trail.
Keep not getting caught.
Next time, if you kill somebody, move.

I'm curious. How much of your adventure did you willingly blot out because it was too visceral?
I feel something would be lost in the experience if you didn't keep all your faculties about you. That's how I would want it.

Go on a full stomach.



Yeah, you got it. Ain't no feelin' like the chase. Gives me a hard on just thinking about it.



Nice work.



It's amazing. It'll always be amazing. You lost it and that's okay. Was Rome built in a fuckin day? No, it took like... a week something, how the fuck should I know? The point is you did it, and if you're going to get better at it you have to do it again, and again, and again until you get it right.

Shit kid, I've been doing it for about 6 months now and I still ain't got it all down pat. You didn't fail; you just found one way that didn't work.

Some pointers?

1. Don't go hungry dipshit. Just cuz our metabolisms are faster than slicked shit doesn't mean our stomachs are bottomless pits. Chances are you tore up more then you ate. I'm a big guy and I can only eat a few pounds of meat from a kill, the rest goes to the other predators hungry for a bite. Even shape shifting, if you were full as a nova you'll be full as a what-ever-the-fuck.

2. Don't go to hunt. There are miles of forest in this world kid, stop and appreciate it. Let the world fill your senses and come to understand the sights the sounds and wonderment. All of these are a key to understanding your instincts. Within them are the triggers that set you off.

3. To kill on instinct is one thing, but to power use on instinct is another. You control the form, do not let the form control you.

4. Take a damn spotter, a nova fast and ballsy enough to kick your ass when you get outta line.

Live and learn, but quit being a pansy about it. You had prime fuckin rib for free. Shit kid, if makes you feel any better I'll buy your neighbor a new fuckin bull. Like to see him start shit when I tell him I ate the god damn thing.

I dare im' to cause a fuss bout it.

I double dare im'.

And this is why Primal is a beacon amongst our species. Damn good to see you on the boards, bro!

Seriously, it depends on how you're using the term "evolution." Are you talking the actual scientific term, or it's neo-Lamarckian pop-culture meaning? If it's the latter case, even baselines evolve, and right now, if you believe in the DEVO theory, most of them who aren't getting their asses shot off in a Third World hellhole are devolving into goods-consuming, robo-fucking androids. In novas, this is accelerated until it's in visible time.

And it's always happening. You can't stop the rock, can't jam the system. Be wary if you think you're standing still: It might mean you're regressing. And the only way to fight it, if you're a nova, is to go out and keep pushing yourself. Follow your node, it always knows! And if it hits a brick wall, that's where you come in. You're the one that has to push it to get what you want. Just be careful what you wish for: the Node will give it to you.

It will be interesting to see were this leads. Are all novas vulneralbe to an increase in sensory input? Is this a shade of something we all will face?

Paramancer, do you believe anything you say?

Dude, I'm not here to troll. I'm here to interact with my people and maybe get some serious shit done.

Could you narrow down your question as to where the confusion lies?

Consider this: the Node is placed directly in the parts of the brain that processes and evaluates sensory information. If we're more aware of the process, and of our environment, it stands to reason that, to some degree, we're going to end up pushing ourselves into...something different. Especially given how much quantum pushed through our brains that isn't used up doing what we want it to do.

Now, we can try to control it, or slow it, but I don't think we can stop it. That ship sailed when we Erupted.

I'm not calling you a troll. I wanted to know if you believed in what you were selling. Good enough.

I do. A lot.