There have probably been several threads similar to this one in the past. And I hesitate to ask because it feels rather like...a "letter to Maggie" type question or something. But anyway...the situation is this:

I have been invited (read: commanded) to go spend Christmas with my family. I get along with exactly one member of my family, and I will be surprised if she shows up. My parents, you see, are stuffy, conservative Michael Archangelite sympathizers. We didn't get along even before I erupted a few months ago, and I think the Christmas may be...awkward.

And even if I get by this time, it won't help our relationship in the long term. I do love my family, even if I don't like them most of the time. If anyone's been in a situation like this before, or has some good advice regardless, speak up. I'm all ears.

You can't please everyone. You have to please yourself.

I'm going to hazard a guess and say that its either stay with your parents over the holiday, or be alone. Is it worse to be alone, or deal with the awkwardness of people you love, but who may not be able to look past your node to realize they love you?

I suggest going, but having a quick and reliable exit strategy. By showing up, you are the Dutiful Son. By leaving before they say things they will regret, you show compassion and wisdom.

There's that, but there's also the possibility that they may not want him over, but feel the need to be dutiful parents. There's no point in maintaining a charade that's just forcing you to sit with people who don't respect you, and you're getting exhausted dealing with them, and no one's really happy enough to justify going through what is, essentially, an empty ritual.

If it's not worth confronting head-on, make up a clever excuse, and find some friends to spend it with. You're a nova, it shouldn't be too hard. Hell, drop me a PM.

Cold, but you make some sense.

I'm not trying to be cold. Family is a rough best to deal with some days. And when religious differences get involved...I knew a girl who came out, once. Her family loved her, but...they were religious, they couldn't respect her for who she was, and they eventually blamed each other for the distance. It would have been saner if they'd realized that there were differences that couldn't be overcome, and dealt with it.

Follow your heart, dude. If you really think they'll learn to respect you and love you regardless of what they believe, go for it. If not, save you and them some future heartache.

Drew, spend it alone, or working. I will. Christmas alone sucks, but making up a gathering to kill the pain is just as likely to remind you of the past you really miss.

Drew, PM me if you feel like a holiday party. Seriously, I tend to be the type who just cheers people up. Or if you want to talk.

Go to Christmas.

Kill your family.

Kill yourself.

You'll have done the world some actual good.

Paramancer, Drew: Meet the board's resident asshole and presumed killer of pets and hater of anyone not white and German. In short, the resident troll. Ignore, and move on.

Yeah, duly noted and ignored.

If you squint, that almost looks like something somebody would care about, huh?

Drew, go with God my son. You have done your work here well.

Fucking iso-heads, and one of them Erupts.

Well, at least there is something we can all agree on is a bad thing, and that's a good thing, right?

I thought it was a bad thing.

Nah, if we kept up with that my lil' thread might start looking like an Abbot and Costello skit.

Bah-dum-tish!

Heh. Feel better, Drew. Hopefully, you've gotten some good advice. The people on this board aren't bad.

(Alptraum doesn't count as people.)

Yeah, I did indeed benefit from this thread. Maybe I should ask Maggie more often.

Thanks for the advice, everyone.

No problem.

Drew,

What you should do depends on how bullet proof you are. Family is important, maybe they'll loosen up if you give them the chance. Or maybe they'll try to kill you for the good of your soul.

But speaking as someone without a family, it's not something to walk away from without a thought.

I like to think my family wouldn't kill me. They aren't Michael Archangelites, after all. Just rather prejudiced. And I'm probably hopelessly optimistic.